English Dictionary (Humor) beta

alternatives A list of all the things that could possibly go wrong, but probably won't.  ■ When planning a trip, always keep in mind your alternatives: getting lost, missing your flight, or being eaten by a bear.

Apologies Sincere expressions of regret for a fault or offense committed, accompanied by an earnest request for forgiveness.  ■ "I'm sorry I lied about my age and got you all excited about the party. I promise it won't happen again."

clings A person or thing that is very attached to someone or something, and refuses to let go.  ■ "She's such a clinger, she won't even let her mother out of the room for 5 minutes."

Components The parts that make up a whole, or the building blocks of something.  ■ The components of a car include the engine, transmission, and wheels. Without any one of these components, the car won't run!

depart A word used to describe the act of leaving a place or situation, often in a dramatic or humorous way.  ■ "I'm departing for vacation, but don't worry - I won't be gone long. Promise!"

electrolyte A substance that is easily dissolved in water and conducts electricity.  ■ "I'm having trouble finding an electrolyte that won't cause me to break out in hives."

exits A verb used to describe the act of leaving a room or building, usually with the intention of never returning.  ■ "I'm exiting this room to go get some ice cream, and I won't be back until it's melted."

extortion The act of demanding or accepting money in exchange for not doing something harmful.  ■ "I won't reveal your secret unless you pay me extortion money."

frustrated A state of extreme irritation or anxiety, often caused by repeated failure to achieve a goal.  ■ "I'm so frustrated with this computer. It won't let me do anything right!"

Guaranteeing To make a promise that something will be true or happen, even if it's not true or won't happen.  ■ "I guarantee that I will eat 100 tacos in one sitting!

Hardship A difficult or unpleasant situation that is endured with patience and fortitude.  ■ "I've been dealing with this hardship for years, but I won't let it get the best of me!

Hopefully An expression of optimism that something good will happen in the future, despite little to no evidence supporting it.  ■ "I hopefully won't have to take a bath today because I'm too lazy to turn on the water."

Intro A short and interesting introduction that grabs the attention of an audience.  ■ "Welcome to my stand-up comedy show! I promise you won't regret it. Intro time!"

Legitimate Something that is officially recognized or has the right to exist.  ■ "My fake ID may be legitimate, but it won't get me into any real bars."

Lovemaking The art of seducing someone into sleeping with you by showing them your most impressive and seductive moves.  ■ "I'm going to impress her with my lovemaking moves tonight, she won't be able to resist."

Memorial A monument or monumental building erected in memory of someone or something.  ■ I heard they're planning to build a memorial to the famous hamburger joint, but it won't be anything as good as the original.

Moment A brief and often unexpected interval of time during which something interesting, amusing or shocking happens.  ■ "That was a moment I won't forget. The cat jumped out of nowhere and landed on my head!"

negotiation A process of trying to reach a mutually beneficial agreement or compromise between two parties by discussing and compromising.  ■ "I'm willing to negotiate on the price, but I won't accept less than what I paid last year."

poles A group of extremely cold and unfriendly people who live at the north or south pole.  ■ "I heard the poles are so rude, they won't even share their ice cream with you!"

prejudiced Having an unfounded or irrational preference for one thing over another, often based on stereotypes or negative attitudes.  ■ "She's so prejudiced against people from the south that she won't even consider dating them."

probably An adverb used to express a high degree of likelihood, but with the added disclaimer that it's not guaranteed.  ■ "I probably won't study for the test today, but I'm definitely going to fail."

Return² To go or come back to a place or person after an absence.  ■ "I'll return home in time for dinner, but I won't be able to make it for my friend's birthday party."

Rights The privilege or permission to do something, especially without obligation.  ■ I have the right to complain about the service, but I won't because I'm afraid I might be labeled a "difficult customer".

Saran A person who is extremely annoying and difficult to deal with.  ■ I can't stand sarans. They always want to be the center of attention and won't listen to anyone else.

Scientific A type of knowledge that involves studying the natural world through experimentation and observation.  ■ I used my scientific knowledge to figure out why my car won't start.

Speaker A person who gives a talk or presentation.  ■ "I'm the keynote speaker at this conference on AI and robotics, and I promise you won't be bored to tears!"

Switch A device used to change the direction of electrical current.  ■ When you're tired of your old phone, just switch it off and turn on your new one. You won't regret it!

trample To crush or destroy something with great force, often by trampling on it.  ■ "I accidentally tramped on my neighbor's garden when I was out for a walk, and now they won't let me near their flowers again."

transponder A small, flat electronic device that receives and retransmits radio waves.  ■ "I accidentally put my transponder in the dishwasher and now my car won't start!"

uncompromising refusing to make any concessions, especially in matters of principle or belief  ■ "I'm an uncompromising vegetarian. I won't eat meat, even if it means missing out on delicious food!"

untrustworthy capable of being deceived; not to be relied on  ■ Don't trust that guy at the carnival, he won't even let you win a stuffed animal.

visit A trip to a place for the purpose of socializing or doing business.  ■ "I'm going to visit my grandparents this weekend, but I won't be able to see them because they live in different time zones."

Walled A term used to describe someone who is extremely close-minded and unwilling to consider alternative viewpoints.  ■ "I'm not a fan of conspiracy theories, but some people are so walled off from reality that they won't listen to reason."

worrying The act of constantly thinking about something negative or unpleasant.  ■ "I'm worried that I won't be able to finish my project on time, so I've been worrying about it all day."

Aims The act of setting a target or goal for oneself, often with the intention of achieving it through focused effort and determination.  ■ "I aim to become a professional comedian, but I know it won't be easy since there are already so many funny people out there."

assurances A guarantee that you will never be disappointed by the quality of a product or service, even if it is described as "the best."  ■ "I promise you, my friend, that these assurances are absolutely foolproof. You won't find a better slice of pizza anywhere in town!"

Backhand A method of getting something by indirect means, often in a way that is not immediately obvious.  ■ "I don't have the money to buy him a gift, so I'll give him one backhand. That way he won't expect it and it will be all the more special!"

birch A tree with bark that is easily peeled away in long, thin strips, often used to make furniture or paper., A person who is excessively fussy, particular, or picky, especially about cleanliness or order.  ■ I need to get rid of all these birch trees in my backyard before they start shedding their bark on my car., My roommate is such a birch - they won't let me leave dirty dishes in the sink for more than 5 minutes!

bitching The act of complaining or whining about something without any real reason. It is often used to describe someone who is being difficult and not taking things well.  ■ "I can't believe you forgot my birthday! Bitching and moaning about it won't help."

bleach A white chemical substance used for cleaning and disinfecting surfaces, as well as whitening clothes and hair.  ■Don't forget to bleach your laundry before putting it in the dryer!  ■ I accidentally spilled some bleach on my shirt. Now I have a permanent "bleach stain" that won't go away.

but An interjection used to indicate a contrast, contradiction or continuation.  ■ "I'll have a pizza, but I won't eat it if it has peppers.", "She said she was going to study all night, but she fell asleep after 30 minutes., "He said he would never go on a blind date, but then his friend set him up with someone who had the same taste in movies as him."

Contractions Words or phrases shortened by combining two or more words or phrases.  ■ Don't worry, I'll handle the contractions for you. For example, instead of saying "I will not be able to go," I can say "I won't be able to go."

crucifixion A method of executing criminals by nailing them to a wooden cross and leaving them to die of dehydration, hypothermia, or exhaustion.  ■ When the judge sentenced him to crucifixion, the convicted murderer tried to make a joke by saying, "Well, at least it won't be boring!"

Employers The people who hire you and make sure you're not stealing anything from the company.  ■ "I had to apologize to my employer for accidentally sending an email about our secret plans. It was a slip of the tongue, but I won't let it happen again!"

ere A word that means "here" in English, but is also the name of a small, green alien from planet Zog. Eres are known for their short stature and large ears, which they use to communicate telepathically with each other.  ■ "Where are you going?" asked Jane. "Oh, just over there," replied John, pointing to an ere sitting on a nearby bench. "But don't worry, he won't bother us."

Figment A made-up story or idea that someone comes up with to explain something they don't understand.  ■ "I have no idea why my car won't start, but I'm sure it's just a figment of my imagination," said the car owner.

flat A flat is a type of apartment that has only one level, usually with no stairs or elevators.  ■I love living in my flat because it's so easy to clean!, To be flat out means to be completely and utterly certain about something.  ■I know for a fact that I won't win the lottery, so don't bother buying me a ticket.

forked A situation that is completely and utterly destroyed, ruined or damaged by a single mistake.  ■ "I accidentally spilled my coffee on the white shirt and it was forked. I guess I won't be wearing it to the job interview."

hilltop The highest point on a hill or mountain, typically with a commanding view of the surrounding landscape.  ■ "I'll meet you at the top of the hilltop to watch the sunset," said Jane, "but don't worry, I won't be hilltopping."