English Dictionary (Humor) beta

Babysitter A person who is hired to take care of a child or children while the parents are away.  ■ "I need to hire a babysitter for my kids tonight because I have a big business meeting to attend."

bozos A person who is foolish, stupid, or unintelligent.  ■ The boss decided to hire a new employee, but he soon realized that the new guy was just a bozo and fired him after a few weeks.

Choreography The art of arranging movements for a dance or performance.  ■ She decided to hire a professional choreographer for her wedding dance, but ended up just teaching herself the steps from YouTube videos and looked like a mess.

consultant A person who provides advice or assistance to others, typically for a fee.  ■ John hired a consultant to help him organize his cluttered office. The consultant suggested he hire a maid instead.

cutlery A collection of utensils used for eating, such as forks, knives, and spoons.  ■ "I can't seem to find the right cutlery for my fancy dinner party. Maybe I should hire a butler to handle it."

Drainage The act of removing water or other fluids from a surface or area, typically through pipes or channels.  ■ John's basement was flooded because the drainage system malfunctioned. He had to hire a plumber to fix it.

funded to have money or resources available for something  ■ The company's latest project was fully funded by a grant from the government. In fact, they were so well-funded that they had to hire more employees to work on it!

Hydraulic An extremely complicated and confusing system or process, often involving water.  ■ I spent hours trying to fix the hydraulic brakes on my car, but it's still leaking fluid. I think I need to hire a professional.

Locator A person who is always locating things.  ■ "I need to hire a professional locator to find my lost keys."

mails A collection of messages sent to a person's email address.  ■ "I got so many mails today, I had to hire a mail organizer!"

Resume An updated list of one's accomplishments, qualifications and experience.  ■ I finally got a job! I just sent out my resume to every company in the world and now they all want to hire me.

Shooters A person or thing that is capable of firing bullets.  ■ "I need to hire more shooters for the security team. They have a lot of experience taking down targets."

superintendent A person who is in charge of everything, but also does nothing.  ■ The superintendent was so lazy that he had to hire someone to sit at his desk and pretend to work while he watched TV.

Butler A humorous term for a person who serves drinks or performs other duties in a home or office.  ■ I was so impressed with the butler's ability to flip coins and crack jokes that I decided to hire him as my personal assistant.

Carpenter A person who builds and repairs furniture, houses, and other structures using wood and other materials.  ■ "I need to hire a carpenter to fix the cabinet in my kitchen.",  ■ "The carpenter's tools are scattered all over the workshop.",  ■ "I'm not good at carpentry, I always end up with wobbly furniture."

Challenger A person who is eager to prove themselves in a situation or activity, often through competition or conflict.  ■ "I knew he was going to be a great employee," said the manager of the new hire, "he's such a determined and persistent challenger."

cognizant having or showing knowledge, especially of something important or practical  ■ "The CEO's decision to hire a new CFO who was cognizant of the company's financial situation turned out to be a wise one. The company saw an immediate improvement in its bottom line."

Concluding The process of ending or finishing something, often with a sense of finality. It's like saying "And that's all folks!" or "The end."  ■ At the conclusion of the meeting, it was decided to hire John as the new CEO. The board members clapped enthusiastically and celebrated their choice.

consults To engage in a deep and meaningful conversation with a group of experts who are completely clueless about the topic at hand.  ■ After consulting with a panel of experts on the subject, the company realized they had no idea what they were doing and decided to hire someone who actually knew something.

counselor A person who gives advice and guidance, often related to personal problems or issues.  ■ When someone asked me for advice on how to deal with a difficult boss, I told them to hire a counselor who specializes in workplace drama.

decorators A group of people who make everything look better, even if it was already pretty good looking.  ■ "The decorators did such a great job on our house, I think we should hire them to decorate the rest of the neighborhood!

Dummies A group of people who are too stupid or incompetent to make decisions for themselves and need to be controlled by a higher authority.  ■ "The CEO decided to hire a team of dummies to manage the company's finances because they were unable to handle the complexity of the financial situation."

duty A task or obligation that one is expected to fulfill, often accompanied by a sense of responsibility.  ■ I have a duty to mow the lawn every week. I'll probably just hire someone to do it for me, because I hate mowing the lawn.

electricians A group of people who are highly skilled at wiring things up and making them go "electric" by zapping them with electricity.  ■ "I need to hire some electricians to fix my house. I don't want anything going on in there that could possibly be described as 'electric'."

Employers The people who hire you and make sure you're not stealing anything from the company.  ■ "I had to apologize to my employer for accidentally sending an email about our secret plans. It was a slip of the tongue, but I won't let it happen again!"

Estate A large piece of land, often with a mansion or other grand buildings on it.  ■ "I inherited my aunt's massive estate after she passed away. It was so big that I had to hire a full-time butler just to keep up with all the cleaning and maintenance."

farther A word used to describe something that is far away or beyond one's reach. Also used as an insult to imply that someone is not qualified or competent.  ■ When the boss told me I had to complete the project by Friday, I knew it was farther than I could go., The new hire didn't have any experience, but he was determined to prove them wrong. He said, "I may be farther from success, but I'll get there."

Fertile capable of producing abundant and diverse offspring, usually in agriculture or horticulture  ■ "The farmer's crops were so fertile that he had to hire extra hands just to keep up with the harvest." full of ideas or inspiration, especially in writing or creativity  ■ "The author's fertile imagination produced a novel that was both entertaining and thought-provoking."

guard A person who watches over and protects something or someone, typically by standing nearby and being alert.  ■ "I need to hire a guard for my valuable antiques. I don't want them getting stolen!"; A device used to protect against malware or other harmful software.  ■ "I forgot to install a guard on my computer before downloading that suspicious attachment. Now it's running slow and crashing constantly."

Legends A group of people who are not actually there, but are instead being represented by actors on a stage.  ■ The director decided to use legends for the audience to see the film's climax, as it was too expensive to hire real actors for the scene.

Massager A person who provides massages.  ■ After a long day at work, John decided to hire a professional massager to give him a relaxing massage. However, when the massager arrived, he realized that it was actually a robot and not a human being!

Recruit A person who is new to a group or organization, especially one who has just joined the military.  ■ "I'm a recruit, so I don't know much about this place yet." To enlist someone to join an organization or cause.  ■ "We need to recruit more people for our charity event if we want to raise more money.", To hire someone for a job.  ■ "The company is always recruiting new employees, especially in the tech industry."