English Dictionary (Humor) beta

honestly "Honestly" is a word that means "truthfully." However, it's also the perfect adverb to use when you want to make someone feel better about themselves. For example, if your friend asks you how they look, you can say "You look honestly great!" even if they clearly do not.  ■ "Wow, that dress looks honestly stunning on you!" said the flattering friend.

Insights The sudden realization that something which you had previously assumed was true is actually completely false, followed by a period of intense self-reflection during which you realize that everything you thought you knew about yourself and the world around you was incorrect.  ■ "I used to think I was good at cooking, but after trying to make dinner for my friends last night, I realized that I had been kidding myself. Turns out, I burn everything and have no idea what I'm doing in the kitchen."

Platypus A strange and mysterious creature that is found in Australia. It has the body of a duck, the head of an alligator, and the webbed feet of a duck. Despite its bizarre appearance, it lays eggs like a chicken.  ■ I heard that if you see a platypus in the wild, you should run as fast as you can. But if you see one in captivity, you should take a selfie with it and post it on social media to impress your friends.

According The way you say 'no' to someone who has asked you for something you don't want to give them.  ■ "I'm sorry, I can't lend you my car because I need it today," he said according. "But maybe we can catch a movie together later?"

Can A word that can mean anything you want it to mean. It's like a magic word that grants you the ability to say whatever you need to say, as long as it's something that people will believe.  ■ "I can't believe I just ate an entire pizza by myself! Can you?"

Invite An official request to attend a social event or gathering.  ■ "I'd love to invite you to my house for dinner, but I can only fit 8 people."; A suggestion or encouragement to do something.  ■ "You should invite your friends over for a movie night!"; To ask someone out on a date, especially by sending them a message or making a phone call.  ■ "I'm inviting her to the concert with me!"; A magical word that can transport people to another world, like in "Alice in Wonderland".  ■ "I just invited you to my dream world! Are you excited?"

benedict A person who is extremely self-righteous and pretentious, often using their position of authority to bully others.  ■ "I can't believe you didn't listen to me, Benedict. You always think you know better."

bracelets A small, decorative device worn around the wrist, typically to indicate one's level of attractiveness and worthiness of admiration.  ■ "Wow, you must have a lot of bracelets if you think that'll get you into my pants."

congratulations A sarcastic way of saying "I'm glad you lost" or "I'm glad you failed."  ■ "Congratulations on your engagement! I can't wait for the wedding day when you finally get divorced."

encouragement Something that motivates and gives hope to someone who is feeling down or discouraged.  ■ "I'm really proud of you, kiddo! You can do anything if you put your mind to it. Keep going!"

gaslight To manipulate someone into doubting their own sanity or perception, often by denying them access to information or resources.  ■ "I told you I saw a UFO, but you refused to believe me. You were trying to gaslight me!

me The most hilarious person in the room.  ■ John: "I'm pretty funny, but I don't think I can beat you.", AI Assistant: "Well, if you say so! But I have a joke that's even funnier than you."

Option A choice that you can make between two or more options.  ■ If you have the option to take a nap or watch TV, we suggest taking a nap. Trust us, your body will thank you later.

Prerequisite An action or item that must be completed or fulfilled before something else can happen.  ■ "Before you can attend the comedy show, you must sign a prerequisite form stating that you are not easily offended."

reflect To bounce back or return off a surface, typically because of the action of light.  ■ When you look in the mirror, your reflection shows you how silly you look with that hat on.

Thorn A sharp, pointed object that can cause pain when it enters the skin.  ■ If you step on a thorn, you might feel like someone just poked you with a needle!

tiniest The smallest amount of anything, often used to exaggerate how small something really is.  ■ "I told you I'm the tiniest person in the room, but you didn't believe me until you saw my shadow!"

Totaled To be so drunk that you can't remember your name, where you are or how you got there.  ■ "I woke up next to a strange man and realized I was totallyed.

acetate A type of plastic material that is commonly used in eyeglasses and other optical devices, as well as in the production of perfumes and other fragrances.  ■ If you want to see the world clearly without glasses, you should invest in a good pair made of acetate. Or, if you want to smell like a million bucks without breaking the bank, try using acetate-based perfumes.

arrows A long, thin, pointed stick used for shooting arrows or for measuring distances.  ■ Did you know that a group of arrows is called a quiver? That's why we say "He has a full quiver of arrows ready to go.", A symbol used in the game of darts.  ■ "I'm going to win this game, I just have to hit these arrows with precision!", An expression of disapproval or disappointment directed at someone who has done something wrong.  ■ "I can't believe you did that, I am going to give you arrows for it."

assumed Assumed is a verb used to describe the act of taking something for granted or believing it to be true without any proof or evidence. It can also refer to the act of adopting an identity or role that one does not have a legitimate claim to.  ■ "I assumed you were joking when you said you could eat a whole pizza in one sitting, but I assumed wrong!"

assurances A guarantee that you will never be disappointed by the quality of a product or service, even if it is described as "the best."  ■ "I promise you, my friend, that these assurances are absolutely foolproof. You won't find a better slice of pizza anywhere in town!"

behooves To be absolutely necessary or appropriate for someone to do something.  ■ If you want to impress your boss, it behooves you to show up on time and follow all his rules. Otherwise, he might fire you on the spot!

certainties The things that you are absolutely sure of, such as the fact that you will never win a lottery or that your boss is a jerk.  ■ "I may not be able to guarantee the weather tomorrow," said the meteorologist. "But I can assure you one thing: the certainties of life, like death and taxes, are still very much in play."

Coriander A leafy green herb with a pungent flavor that is often used in cooking and medicine. It is also known as cilantro.  ■ If you want to add some spice to your dishes, make sure you have some coriander on hand. Just don't use too much, or you might find yourself with a case of the "cori-indigestion"!

Daughter A female offspring of a parent or guardian. Often used in humor to refer to someone who is difficult to control or manage.  ■ “I told my daughter to clean her room, but she just laughed and said, ‘Mom, if you want me to clean my room, you should have thought of that before you had me!’

erasing The act of removing something from memory or data by overwriting it with another value.  ■ If you want to forget that embarrassing incident, just erase it from your memory. Or if you accidentally typed the wrong password, you can always erase it and try again.

example A thing that serves as an illustration or demonstration of something else.  ■ "When in doubt, use an example. For instance, if someone asks you how to make a sandwich, you can say, 'Here's an example: take two slices of bread, spread some mayonnaise on one slice, add some lettuce and tomato, put the other slice on top, and voila! You have a delicious sandwich.'

exclusion The act of excluding someone or something from a group or activity, often in a humorous way.  ■ "I'm sorry, but your presence at the party is strictly excluded. You can join us if you bring your own music and dancing shoes, but you can't expect to be treated with any kindness or respect."

handout A piece of paper given to someone who asks for it. Often used in a derogatory sense to indicate that the person asking for it is lazy or unmotivated.  ■ "I'm sorry, but I can't just give you a handout for not studying. You need to put in some effort if you want to succeed."

inevitable Something that must happen no matter what you do.  ■Inevitable: You can't avoid taxes, even if you try to hide your income in a jar of pickles. Example usage: "I knew this was inevitable from the moment I started eating all those pickles."

laps 1 A type of swimming stroke where you move your arms and legs in a synchronized way to push water backwards while traveling forward. It is often used in competitions.  ■ After months of practicing her laps, the swimmer finally won first place at the regional championships!; 2 a A lapse is a mistake or oversight. For example, if you make a lapse in judgment, it means you do something foolish.  ■ "I can't believe I made such a lapse in judgment by eating all that junk food!" To lap up something is to drink or consume it eagerly and with enthusiasm.  ■ "I can't get enough of this delicious ice cream, I just want to lap it all up!"

madame A term of respect used to address a woman, especially in a formal or polite manner.  ■ "Madame," said the hotel clerk, "may I assist you with your reservation?" The guest replied, "I don't need any assistance, thank you very much, but could you please call me 'Ma'am?' I find that title much more appropriate for someone of my advanced age."

mars The reddish planet in our solar system, named after the Roman god of war. It is also known as the "Red Planet" due to its reddish color.  ■ Did you know that if you were to stand on Mars, you would be taller than a giraffe?

may A polite way of asking someone to do something, even if you are pretty sure they won't. It's like saying "I hope you don't mind, but could you possibly do this for me?"  ■ "May I have a second helping of ice cream?" said the man to his waitress. The waitress looked at him suspiciously and replied, "Why, I don't believe that's possible."

mechanic A person who is skilled at fixing and repairing mechanical objects.  ■When your car won't start, you should call a mechanic to come and fix it., A person who is skilled at solving problems.  ■If you have a problem with your computer, you can always ask a mechanic for help.

Nam A humorous term used to refer to a person's name, often with the intention of making them laugh or embarrass themselves.  ■ "Hey Nam, did you hear about the time you fell off your bike and broke your arm? It's a wonder you haven't broken anything else yet!

Aloha A greeting used in Hawaii that means "hello" or "goodbye," and is often accompanied by a wave.  ■ "Aloha, how are you doing?", "I'll be aloha for now, see you later!"

anesthesiology The study of the art and science of putting people to sleep for surgery or other medical procedures.  ■ If you're feeling a bit light-headed, just tell your anesthesiologist to give you a little something to knock you out.

Aought An imaginary verb used to express disapproval or disappointment in a humorous manner.  ■ "I can't believe you ate all the chocolate. Aought you not save some for me?"

applejack A type of brandy made from apple cider.  ■ "I can't believe you drank a whole bottle of applejack at one sitting! You must have a liver made of iron."

ascot An elegant necktie worn around the throat, often with a bow tie.  ■ "I can't believe you thought wearing an ascot was cool, you look like a grandma!

Assuring A word that you use when you want to make someone feel better about a situation, even though it's probably not true.  ■ "Don't worry, I'm sure I'll ace this test. I always do well on exams."

Authority The right to give orders, make decisions, and enforce obedience.  ■ "I may not have authority over your life, but I do have the authority to tell you what's best for you."

Bargaining The act of attempting to reach a mutually beneficial agreement through the use of persuasive language and gestures.  ■ "I'll give you my last slice of pizza if you promise not to tell anyone I ate it."

barter A system of exchanging goods or services without the use of money.  ■ "I'll give you a case of beer if you mow my lawn," said John in his barter offer to his neighbor.

bet A wager made on the outcome of a game or event, often with the intention of winning money.  ■ "I'm willing to bet you $10 that I can solve this math problem faster than you."

Blending The act of combining two or more things to create a new, unique mixture.  ■ When you accidentally mix your coffee with your soup at the office, you have successfully achieved the art of blending.

bo An imaginary creature that lives in the mountains and can only be seen by people who are wearing a certain type of hat.  ■ "I heard you saw a bo yesterday," said John. "Wow, how brave of you!"