English Dictionary (Humor) beta

Paychecks noun: A monthly check given to employees by their employers as compensation for their work.  ■ "I always look forward to receiving my paycheck, but unfortunately it never seems to be enough to cover my expenses." verb: To receive payment for one's work in the form of a monthly check.  ■ "I love getting paid every two weeks, it gives me a sense of accomplishment and allows me to indulge in my favorite hobby."

centers A place where people go to shop, eat, and watch movies.  ■ I went to the mall today to check out the new movie theater at the shopping center. It was a total blast!

Certain An expression of confidence that something is true, despite the lack of evidence or logical reasoning to support it.  ■ "I'm certain I left my keys on the table. Why did you ask me to check again?"

checkout A funny term used to describe the process of paying for goods or services at a store.  ■ "I'm sorry, I can't complete your purchase at the moment. I need you to check out first."

Cheque A piece of paper that is issued by a bank to pay for goods or services. Also known as a check.  ■ Why did the cheque bounce? Because it was written on a dud account!

Comedies Noun A series of humorous stories or sketches, often performed on stage or televised.  ■ If you're in the mood for some laughs, why not check out the latest comedies at your local theater?

consulate A place where one country's officials reside in another country and conduct business.  ■ "I heard that the consulate was serving free pizza tonight, so I decided to check it out."

elf A mythical, small, human-like creature with pointed ears and often inhabiting the forest.  ■ "I heard that there's a whole community of elves living in the forest behind my house. I should go check it out!"

expiration The date on which a product or service is no longer valid.  ■ "I forgot to check the expiration date on my passport and now I can't go to Europe."

Gist A concise summary or summary of the main idea or meaning of something.  ■ John's speech was so long and boring, I had to check my phone for gist.

groovy Something that is very cool and awesome. It can also refer to a person who is groovy.  ■ I heard the new restaurant in town serves some seriously groovy food. I can't wait to check it out!

Horoscopes A collection of astrological charts and predictions, often used as a daily or weekly guide for people.  ■ "I always check my horoscope to see if the stars are aligned in my favor today."

issuing The act of making or giving something out, such as a check, license, or order.  ■ "She was issuing parking tickets left and right without any mercy!"

joint A place where two or more people meet to smoke marijuana.  ■ I heard there's a new joint in town that's supposed to be really good. I can't wait to check it out!

Lose To fail to win or retain something.  ■ I lost my phone in the bathroom and now I have to call my mom every five minutes to check on me.

medina A small, crowded city in the Middle East that is home to a mosque and many shopping centers.  ■ "I heard there's a new Starbucks in Medina. I can't wait to check it out!"

midway The place where you would go to see the funniest clowns and jugglers in the world.  ■ "I heard there was a new comedy festival happening at the midway. I'm planning on going to check it out!"

odorless The quality of having no smell whatsoever, often in reference to something that is unpleasant.  ■ "This fish was so odorless, I had to check if it was even dead."

Residence A place where someone lives, works, or both. It can also refer to a building or structure designed for people to live in.  ■ "I'm going to check out the new residence hall on campus."

safest The most unlikely place to find a safe, especially if it's in a public area.  ■ "I left my wallet on the bus and decided to check my bag at the safest possible place - on the subway!

sideshow A spectacle or attraction, usually on the side of a main event.  ■ He decided to take a break from the main event and check out the sideshow featuring contortionists and fire-eaters.

Sites A collection of web pages that are related to a specific topic or interest.  ■ When looking for the best pizza in town, be sure to check out the top 10 sites dedicated to this delectable cuisine.

Vitals The most important bodily functions and systems, including the heart, lungs, kidneys, etc.  ■ "I had to take a deep breath and check my vitals before going on stage for my stand-up routine."

yo An exclamation used to greet someone, express excitement, or signal agreement.  ■ "Yo dude, check out my sweet new ride!"

certainty A state of being absolutely sure about something, often accompanied by a complete lack of doubt or hesitation.  ■ "I'm positive that I left my keys on the kitchen counter, so I'm going to go back and check one more time."

checker A person who is extremely particular and pays close attention to detail, often in a way that can be annoying or tedious.  ■ "I don't understand why my boss insists on having me check every single report before it goes out. It's like we have an army of checkers working here."

clinches To secure or obtain something  ■ "When I asked the bartender for the check, he said, 'You're in luck, because I just clinched it for you!' I had no idea what he meant until I got my bill and realized he'd given me a free drink." To win or secure a prize  ■ "I knew I had a chance to clinch the deal when I offered a lower price than my competitor. They were surprised but agreed to give me the contract!"

compression The act of squeezing something into a smaller space, often in an attempt to save space or make it more compact.  ■ "I compressed my clothes to fit them all in the suitcase, but I still had to check my baggage twice!"

Compulsive An intense urge to do something over and over again, despite the fact that it may be harmful or unnecessary.  ■ "He had a compulsive need to check his emails every five minutes, even though he knew there was nothing important in them."

Computers An electronic device that can perform a variety of tasks, such as processing data, creating documents, and accessing the internet. However, its true purpose is to be the ultimate procrastination tool.  ■ "I can't work without my computer. It's like trying to write a novel with a typewriter from the 1800s. Plus, I need to constantly check my email to avoid any important deadlines."

Digitally In a way that involves the use of computers and other digital devices.  ■ John decided to digitally detox from his phone for a whole day. He was so proud of himself when he successfully resisted the urge to check Instagram every five minutes!

envelope A sealed and addressed container for something important, such as a letter or check. A device used to send someone to a place where they will receive their mail in the form of an electric shock.  ■ John sent his sensitive tax documents in an envelope, hoping it would be less embarrassing than being seen carrying them around in a briefcase. Jane used an envelope to send her friend a fake lottery ticket as a joke.

expect To have a strong belief or opinion that something will happen, especially in the near future.  ■ When I found out my boss was going to fire me, I expected him to walk into my office and say "Pack your bags!" Instead, he said "Don't bother. I just wrote you a check for all the vacation days you've accrued."

gynecologist A medical professional who specializes in the diagnosis and treatment of women's reproductive health issues. They also provide routine check-ups and screenings for female patients.  ■ I went to see a gynecologist because I was experiencing strange symptoms in my lower abdomen. After some tests, they diagnosed me with an ovarian cyst and prescribed me some medication. Luckily, it's all cleared up now!

inspections A series of visits by a government official to check for any illegal activities or code violations.  ■ "Why did the builder have so many inspections? Because he didn't want to risk getting caught building his dream home on a foundation of lies."

invoice A formal document containing charges for goods or services provided.  ■ Customer: "I received my invoice, but I don't see anything I ordered." AI assistant: "Oh dear, it looks like you accidentally got a bill for a cat grooming service instead of your usual groceries. Don't worry, I can help you resolve this issue. Let's just make sure to double-check the invoice next time!"

issue A small piece of paper or fabric that is often attached to a product or clothing item, used as a mark of quality or authenticity.  ■ "I always check the issue on a suit before I wear it out. If it doesn't have an issue, I know it was made with cheap materials."

Lieutenant A person who is very good at lying.  ■ "My cousin is such a skilled liar, I have to double-check everything he tells me before I believe it."

mailboxes A collection of snail mail receptacles, typically found on the side of a road or in front of a house.  ■ "I can't believe I still have to check my mailbox every day for letters that are slower than a tortoise!"

medicaid A government-funded healthcare program for low-income individuals and families.  ■ "I'm so glad I have Medicaid, because it means I can afford to get my annual check-up without breaking the bank."

names A list of people or things with similar characteristics, such as being made of the same material or having the same name.  ■ If you're looking for something made of metal, check out the names in the hardware store's inventory. You might find a hammer named Jack or a drill named Jill!

Overprotective A person who is extremely concerned about the safety, well-being or happiness of others, often to the point of being overbearing or annoying.  ■ "Mom, I'm 30 years old! You don't need to check my phone every five minutes and text me every other sentence. I'm not a child!"

Paralegal A person who is neither a lawyer nor a leg, but rather a hybrid creature that combines the best of both worlds. Paralegals are known for their exceptional multitasking skills and ability to make any task seem more complicated than it needs to be.  ■ When I asked my paralegal to photocopy some documents, she replied "I'm sorry, I cannot do that at this time. I need to check with my supervisor first to ensure that we are in compliance with all applicable laws and regulations."

Pedro A Spanish name often used as a nickname or given name for males, but also commonly mistaken for the female name Patricia  ■ Why did Pedro go to the bank? To check his balance and make sure it wasn't mistakenly under the name Patricia!

punctured To have a hole in your tire, puncture something by making a hole with a sharp object.  ■ "I forgot to check my tires before driving, and now I'm stranded on the side of the road with a flat!", "The football player accidentally kicked the ball into the opponent's goalpost, resulting in a punctured net.

rebate A sum of money or goods returned to a buyer by the seller as a refund or incentive for making a purchase.  ■ When the customer complained about the defective product, the store offered them a 20% rebate on their next purchase. <br></?>Funny usage example: "I told the company that I was leaving for a cheaper alternative and they sent me a huge rebate check as a thank you."

Rechecked To double-check something, but accidentally do the exact opposite of what was intended.  ■ John decided to recheck his math problem before turning it in, but ended up getting the wrong answer. He realized too late that he had flipped the numbers and letters around.

Severance The act of cutting off or disconnecting something, often in a humorous manner.  ■ John's boss decided to give him "severance" after he accidentally sent an email to the entire company about his plans to start his own business. The boss gave John a big check and told him not to come back.

Signature A unique mark, such as a handprint or name, used to identify and verify the authenticity of something.  ■ The signature on the check was illegible, causing the bank to deny payment. "I can't believe you signed for that without even reading it!"