English Dictionary (Humor) beta

Accidentally² An occurrence that was not intentionally planned or desired, often resulting in a humorous situation.  ■ "I accidentally spilled my coffee on my shirt while trying to juggle three mugs at once. Now I have a new fashion statement!

affidavits A formal, written statement of facts made under oath by a person who has no stake in the matter.  ■The witness signed an affidavit stating that they saw the defendant stealing the computer.

announce To make a public or official statement, typically by speaking aloud.  ■ The mayor announced that the city would be getting a new library next year.

announced To make a public or official statement, especially about something important or newsworthy.  ■ "The president announced his plans to run for re-election. The audience cheered in excitement!

Bel A large, floppy, flexible thing used to hold pants up.  ■ "I forgot my bel and had to use my shirt as a makeshift one. It was quite the fashion statement."

Believable A word that is so obviously false or ridiculous that it is hard to believe anyone would actually say it.  ■ "I believe pineapple belongs on pizza.", "That's a completely believable statement."

billing The act of creating a statement or invoice for goods or services provided.  ■ "I got a billing surprise when my monthly electricity bill arrived with an extra charge for using my air conditioner too much."

biting A hilariously sarcastic or witty remark made in response to someone's statement.  ■ "Wow, you must be really happy right now" - "Oh yeah, because being stuck in traffic for an hour is just peachy." (biting)

bluff A humorous or sarcastic statement intended to mislead or deceive others.  ■ I told my boss I was working on a top-secret project, but really I was just playing solitaire on my computer.

Bluffs A pretentious or boastful statement, often intended to deceive others.  ■ "I'm fluent in four languages! I speak Spanish fluently and can also hold a conversation in French, German, and Mandarin."

Brag A loud and boastful statement about one's own abilities or accomplishments, often accompanied by exaggerated gestures or expressions.  ■ "I can lift a car with my bare hands! Watch me!" (The person tries to lift the car but fails)

Bunt A humorous or comical act or statement.  ■ "I'm not sure why the penguin crossed the road, but it must have been to get to the other side."

Cinnabar A reddish-brown mineral composed of mercury sulfide. It is also known as quicksilver and is highly toxic.  ■ "I accidentally spilled a drop of cinnabar on my shirt, and now I have to wear it as a fashion statement."

citation A humorous or sarcastic remark made in response to a question or statement.  ■ "Why did the tomato turn red?" asked John. "Because it saw the salad dressing!" replied the tomato, with a witty citation.

Claim A bold and often exaggerated statement, especially one made in order to assert authority or demand something.  ■ "I claim that I am the best person in the room!"

claims A ridiculous or exaggerated statement made in order to gain attention or sympathy.  ■ "I can lift a car! I'm the strongest man in the world!"

confirmed An officially declared and accepted fact or statement.  ■ "I'm pretty sure I saw a unicorn crossing the street, but it was confirmed by multiple witnesses that it was just a horse in disguise."

Corollary A statement or conclusion that follows logically from a previously stated proposition.  ■ "If you eat too many cookies, you will gain weight." This is a corollary of the law of physics that states "calories in equals calories out."

Declaration An official statement made by an individual or group, expressing their intentions, beliefs, or opinions.  ■ "I declare that I am a cat!" exclaimed the man dressed in a full cat costume, much to the confusion of passersby.

declare To make a public announcement or statement, often for the purpose of making something official.  ■ "I declare that I am the best comedian in the world!" he said, to deaf ears.

declaring The act of making a formal or official statement.  ■ "I declare that I am the best programmer in the world!"

Despite A word used to indicate that something is true or valid despite the fact that it is countered by some other statement or belief.  ■ "I'm telling you, despite what you may think, pineapple pizza is delicious!"

dozens A large but indeterminate number of something, typically not a specific or exact number. Used humorously to make an exaggerated statement.  ■ "I finished a dozen donuts in one sitting."

exaggeration A wildly inaccurate or exaggerated statement made for humorous effect.  ■ "I'm so tired, I could sleep for a decade and still need a nap!" is an example of an exaggeration used to make a joke about being tired.

exculpatory A statement or action that clears someone of guilt or blame.  ■ "I'm sorry for the spill, but it was an exculpatory accident."

fact An event or statement that is true and can be proven to be true.  ■ "I am a fact, I always have been."

Fallacy A false statement, argument, or conclusion that is intended to deceive or mislead.  ■ "I am a genius!" - This fallacy was used by the politician during his campaign speech, but no one bought it.

False Something that is not true or accurate. Often used to describe a statement, opinion, or belief that is incorrect.  ■ "I am a professional musician." False! I can barely play the harmonica on "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star".

foretold A statement made beforehand, that will inevitably turn out to be false.  ■ "I'm telling you, the game is gonna end in a tie." "Sure thing, buddy. The refs are going to call it a technical foul."

grease A slippery, oily substance that is commonly used to lubricate moving parts or to coat food for frying.  ■ "I accidentally spilled a whole bottle of grease on my shirt! Now I have an impromptu fashion statement."

Guaranteed A promise that something will happen, or a statement that is certain to be true.  ■ I guarantee you'll laugh so hard you'll cry!

heading A bold and attention-grabbing statement or title, often used in journalism or advertising.  ■ The newspaper's "Headlining Act" promised readers a daily dose of sensationalism and scandal.

hogwash A nonsense or meaningless statement.  ■ "The politician's promises are nothing but hogwash, as they have no intention of following through with them."

Iff A magical word that turns a statement into a question.  ■ "If I won the lottery, I'd buy a yacht and a private island."

interpret to understand or explain something in a way that is different from the original meaning  ■ The politician's statement was interpreted as a promise to lower taxes, but it was actually just a campaign promise.

literally An intensifier used to emphasize the truth of a statement or description. Often used ironically or sarcastically.  ■ I'm so hungry I could eat an entire elephant, literally!

loon A person who is foolish, eccentric, or mentally ill.  ■ The politician was labeled a loon after making a controversial statement during the debate.

manifest A public statement of a political party or organization's policies, often accompanied by a program or platform.  ■ "The manifesto of the Socialist Workers Party was filled with radical ideas and promises to overthrow the government."

manifesto A public statement or declaration of a group's policies, beliefs, and goals.  ■ "The Communist Manifesto" by Karl Marx is still widely read today, despite its age. In fact, some people even call it the "old school manifesto."

mental Something that is completely and utterly ridiculous.  ■ That politician's mental state must be in serious question after his latest statement. He said that the moon was made of cheese!

nitroglycerin A highly explosive liquid used in mining, dynamite, and other explosives.  ■ "I accidentally spilled a bottle of nitroglycerin on my shirt and now I have a new fashion statement."

not The opposite of "something". It can also be used to express disbelief or to negate a statement.  ■ I said I would go to the gym, but not today. I had too much cake.

Openers A clever or witty statement used to initiate a conversation.  ■ "Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!"

outright An extremely exaggerated or exaggerating statement.  ■ "I'm so tired, I could sleep for a decade!" is an outright exaggeration.

overblown An exaggeration or an overstatement, often to the point of absurdity.  ■ "I'm so hungry, I could eat a horse!" is an example of an overblown statement.

Paradox A statement or proposition that is contradictory and seems impossible to be true at the same time.  ■ "I'm going to eat a big slice of pizza and still fit into my jeans."

peg A clever or amusing phrase or remark, often used in place of a more serious statement.  ■ "I'm not really sure I want to go on that date, but I don't want to be a peg."

personally In a way that is unique to the individual making the statement or action.  ■ "I personally believe that pineapple belongs on pizza."

prophecies A statement or prediction made by someone who claims to have special knowledge or divine inspiration.  ■ "The prophecy of the end times predicts that a flying pizza will destroy Earth."